Sons.

I thought I was struggling with my two sons. Both of them in their late teens, entering early adulthood. Seem to know everything and not want to do anything. Unless it’s for them. And, of course, now they are that age they are old enough to do things for themselves and don’t need parental permission. But often need parental money. Then, talking to a work colleague who has two boys of a similar age I realised it was a universal problem, everything I described, she was also going through or had done. As we were talking a customer overheard and joined in the conversation, experiencing exactly the same things we had been discussing.

Before I start I would like to say that I think my two sons are amazing people and growing into even more amazing young men. They are both talented in different ways, full of energy and able to think for themselves. They are also liked and respected by everyone they meet or are involved with in the many activities they take part in.

That said….

….when they come into the house, it is rare they actually stay downstairs and talk to myself or their mother. Instead going straight to their rooms and hibernating. Only appearing when they want food. In fact one of them orders his food by text! When food is ready they will wait as long as possible before coming to get it, hoping one of us will take it up to them. Bringing used plates down never happens.

They do get washed, showered. After almost every movement they take a shower. Go to the shop and back, take a shower. Play sport, take a shower. Return from visiting a friend, take a shower. Each time using a different towel and leaving it to dry itself on the bathroom floor. Unless the cleaning fairies come along and tidy up. One of them leaving underpants in exactly the same place every morning, having to step over them to get out of the bathroom. This has improved slightly with the introduction of a washing basket on the landing.

They never seem to stop eating. Their diets are very different. One of them doesn’t mind what he has as long as it is with chips, doesn’t include vegetables and is not too spicy. The other eats anything. However he has now started to complain about the way it is cooked, this has never been a problem previously. More interestingly he wants to cook himself. Which sounds great, but refuses to wash up, and there is never the right food in the house.

I was once a young adult, with a younger brother. I’m pretty sure I was never this bad. Then when they do something it brings back a memory of what I did or said, or didn’t do. Unfortunately my parents are no longer here, but I feel sure that if they were and I asked them or told them about things, they would put me straight.